RuPaul's All Stars Drag Race Recap - The Grand Finale

Thank Jesus this ride is finally over. Can we get to season five already? I'm ready for me some new bitches. These girls do make an impression, though. Believe me. Let's take a moment and find out who wins this!

Spoiler alert!

After that long clip-show-esque intro, we finally get the girls into the work room, where Shannel reveals she isn't bitter about having a top four. None of them are, actually. Odd, no?

This is not RuPaul's Best Friend Race any more! Each of them is on their own now. No more teams. The final challenge is that they each have to come up with a comedy routine to perform live. Hmmm. Sounds like season three. Oh wait, none of them bitches are left. They have to do a celebrity interview, make a special appearance, and a performance. Each one needs a new look, and they have to change in a car. This is going to be a hot damn mess.

The challenge starts, and there are only two drag-mobiles. They get mismatched partners, with Shannel and Juju having DELTA WORK as a driver, and Chad and Raven getting ONGINA as a driver! Hell yes it's about time Ongina is back! I love me some Delta, too.

The first part is a group interview, so I expect a cat fight. Everyone starts talking over Juju, and she started getting pissed. She needs to know that she's gotta fight for her time in the spotlight, hunty. Chad was getting pretty pissy, too.

Next up, they have to head to Hamburger Mary's to get a burger named after them. Apparently this is a big deal? Each of them had to give a speech, and the strongest was obviously Raven, but I can't say for sure, because the pit crew boys were so hot. They even each had to take a bite, wherein Chad spent most of his time, licking it. They each got presented the key to the city as well? This is getting a little over the top.

Next up: The comedy bits. Who will be the funniest? Shannel? Probably not. Raven? Probably.

Juju looked 100% fish, and she was ready to rock it. And she did! I was pretty happy with her routine. Her grandma bit was hilarious.

Chad had a lot of crowd interaction, but her jokes weren't all that funny to me. The crowd was laughing , but I think she was just kind of annoying with it.

Raven was up third. Starting off with a joke about her outfit, but her jokes about her being a whore, were actually really funny. I actually was loving her outfit with that redic wig. She looked completely fab, and sounded completely fab. IT WAS JUST FAB!

Shannel was last. She went with the black woman body joke. She was the least funny of them all, which makes me sad, because I was starting to like Shannel.

They get back in the work room, and that bitch Juju is wearing a Manila tshirt.  Yaaas! Each of them discusses why they deserve to win, and each of them keep giving generic answers -- except for Shannel, who gave a bit of a passive aggressive answer. God Shannel and I are the same person. Exact same person.

Runway time!

Chad has some fierce shoulder pads, looking right out of the 80s. Loving every second of that blue sequin.

Juju is fish yet again, and has a beautiful ruffled dress on.

Shannel has a red hot mess on. Cannot stand it.

Raven has a sexy dark seductrice look to her this time.

It's time for one fo these bitches to snatch that crown. Immediately he sends Shannel and Juju home. One of my top gals is down. Now it's up to Raven and Chad to lip sync against each other to win it. Raven owned the entire lip sync, stealing the show right out of Chad's hands.